The First Time I Thought I Was Having Maddy.

I'm going to be completely frank here when I say that I tend to overreact. I know, it's completely shocking, but I do.

And apparently other moms at this stage in the game do as well, so for me to sit here and panic the other night I'm told is normal. Finally.

Facebook knows what happened. Twitter doesn't. Somehow fitting my saga into 140 characters would just not suffice and I'm not one to do that (1/3) or twitlonger bologna.

So you want to know what happened? Gotchya. Obviously I've really hyped this up so hopefully you're entertained.

It's close to my bed time and I'm feeling grimey. I had a subway ride and sat in the seat since my feet were so swollen. Seat smelled like piss which is always my fear whenever I'm on the Market Frankford Line. Anyway. I came home, got in the shower, nuked myself until I decided I should save a whale or two and just go to bed. I'm always greeted by my cat the minute I pull my shower curtain back. Zombs is obsessive with licking the shower curtain lately. Somewhere between him jumping up on the ledge of the bathtub to lick the curtain and me drying off, he decided to scratch my foot because why not!?

I'm so immune to Zombie scratching me in a playful way that I'm almost completely unphased when his daggers get me. This was one of those moments. But Zombie is like a dog so once I shut the light off in the bathroom and headed into my bedroom, he followed, ran ahead of me and jumped up on the bed looking all cute - to which I could not resist petting him and loving him.

There I was, sitting on my leg, wrapped in my robe petting my cat. Two minutes later Zombie decided biting was a more fun option to which I said "Forget you!" and decided to get dressed. That's when I noticed a brown "spot" on my bed. Holy shit. It's blood. It's f*cking blood! I touched it. Jesus Christ. It's wet, fresh blood. I start panicking when I notice another spot. Oh my God. All I can think of is who's bleeding?! Is it me? Is it my vagina? Is it my baby coming out? Is this labor? Was that my mucus plug? Is my cat bleeding? All no. Where the hell did this blood come from? I'm running to the bathroom - nothing. I'm checking Zombie for cuts - nothing. I'm calling her baby daddy crying, Googling the shit out of things (all of which are only showing spotting in the first trimester and not last) and just ultimately freaking out because at this point I don't even know what number to call and it's 10:30pm and I'm certain I don't want to spend the night in the ER.

Finally, I stand in front of my full length mirror and start inspecting and that's when I flex my heel (which I cannot see without said mirror because of my Maddy belly growth) and see a speck of blood start to appear. Are you kidding me? It was all from that cat scratch in the bathroom maybe 20 minutes ago. So I know I have to call Maddy's dad back.

I know I have to tell him I'm a crazy person and that it's nothing to do with labor.

That it's a cat scratch.

On the plus side, he handled my franticness very well - completely calm and reserved and said "If we have to go to the hospital tonight so be it" and didn't make too much fun of me when I finally came clean about where the mystery blood came from.

So there you have it. My first time thinking I was having a kid and it turns out to be a cat scratch. Now you have a glimpse of what my other half has to deal with on a daily basis. Poor guy! These stories are only going to get better; I'm calling it now... Stay tuned!

A Long Overdue Update

Ok ok ok. I give in. I have gone an entire month without blogging and to no one's fault but my own. Unless you count Netflix and that addicting House of Cards show.  Oh. And Maddy. Maddy has caused this Mama to start "nesting" - scrubbing carpets, the bathroom, my bedroom, her bedroom, the kitchen, rearranging her clothes in the drawers and in the closet (to the point of changing which hangers her stuff was on because my mind was that off the deep end). And now, I'm ironically calm. Or at least attempting to be as my hands feel like I have arthritis and my feet look like we took her dad's bike pump and pumped a quart of air into them. 

So pregnancy has been testing my sanity. Nine times out of ten I stop myself and ask why the hell I am cleaning the stove top again. Or cleaning all her bottles. Again. Or rearranging her diaper bag(s) again. And everyone I speak to tells me I need to rest, I need to relax. This would be great if my mind weren't running a million miles per hour. Maybe it's anxiety that stems from the approaching "single mom" world I'm about to venture into. Despite having an amazing group that supports me being a mom (including Maddy's daddy) I can't help but panic or think of things I have to get done. Typing this, I've just realized I still haven't put together her stroller successfully - that shit is definitely a two people job. And don't get me started on the fact that my car's interior looks dirtier than my Ford Escort that I had in high school. I'm going to put a kid in that?  But I don't even know where the closest car wash is. 

But the last month hasn't all been stressful to the point of me going from brunette to gray. That'll happen post-baby and once my daughter hits her teen years. The past month I've been so grateful in many aspects including my baby shower thrown by my sisters and mom. They went above and beyond - as did all my friends & family members. I was grateful that some of Maddy's paternal relatives made an appearance, too. 

Baby showers go by so fast. I seriously felt like I walked in, opened presents, ate (kind of) and walked out only to go home and unpack everything and then divy up the loot between what stays at mom's house and what goes to dad's. It was a beautiful day though and I'm again, beyond grateful. Our daughter -- beyond spoiled! I literally came home and cried my eyes out, completely overwhelmed.

We are approaching week 36. Aka, I've officially begun to get nervous every single time I go to the bathroom. I'm paranoid! Completely paranoid! Every time I wake up in the middle of the night I think "Is this it? Is this my water breaking" and then of course, I finally have Braxton Hicks contractions. I'll tell you more about that later (look for the story about me thinking I was in labor tomorrow morning!)

Mommy & Daddy are getting along great (knock on wood!) and work is going well, too. I am overall in a really good mood and just really anxious to meet my little girl!